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What is it?

Character: Chael Sonnen
From: UFC (Ultimate Fighting Championship)
Type: Sport Stars
What is this clip about: In this clip, there is a mash up of a selection of Chael’d interviews, that show him being self-amusing.

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Why should I watch it?

  • Chael is by far one of the most amusing Sports stars you will ever listen to. Every media appearance or interview he has, he talks as he thinks. He really doesn’t care what he says, he just self-amuses himself as he goes.
  • He has created a persona or a identity for himself as ‘The Most Interesting Man’. People now expect it of him and will watch his interviews etc to see what he will do next. This gives him internal self-confidence reference points and builds his confidence and allows his to do his thing.
  • He verbally rides the beta males in the interviews. Some are afraid to look him in the eye or confront him. He looks people direct in the eye as if he is challenging them to try and interrupt him. He talks loud and clearly and with passion. Beta males just let him talk for fear of what he may do next.
  • Chael just doesn’t care. He says as he feels. He makes jokes and self amuses as he goes. Notice how he never backs down regardless of what is happening. Even surrounded by tough as nails MMA fighters (at the Press Conferences) he doesn’t care, he just talks as he wants.

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How can I do that?

  • To be frank, Chael is not a complete Alpha Male. Some of what he does is completely wrong and beta.
  • Practice in all social situations. Start small and take baby steps. Try and push the tempo of all conversations. Go for broke, say what you want. You will need to grow a set and say what you think. People may react at first but keep at it long enough and people will accept it as a reality.
  • On nights out etc, make women a secondary target. Go out with the sole idea of having fun. Make a target of saying as you think and enjoying what you do e.g. bored in a conversation then leave etc. You don’t need to suck up to people. Your mission is to simply have fun. Strangely enough, girls will be attracted to you if you are ignoring them and just having fun. Weird but true!
  • Try new things and hobbies. Find things in your life that you truly enjoy and make you have fun. Make your life as fun as possible so you find everything enjoyable.
  • Try hobbies such as public speaking, stand up comedy classes etc. These sort of classes will help you get used to talking to crowds and being funny. They will also help you deal with pressure from crowds and saying what you think regardless.

So, do I have it right? Did it blow your mind or suck ass? Let me know in the comments below and then watch another!

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What is it?

Character: Frankie Boyle
From: A range of Comedy Shows.
Type: Comedy Stars
What is this clip about: Frankie Boyle’s 10 darkest (read funniest!) jokes.

 

Why should I watch it?

  • Comedy is funny, Frankie Boyle is funnier. His jokes are like those you tell your friend when no one else is listening, he just says it out loud.
  • Boyle doesn’t pull any punches. He is self amusing throughout. You can tell he is just being himself and saying what he finds funny (notice he laughs at most of his own jokes).
  • He doesn’t suck up – like most people would do – when people comment on how bad his jokes are. He sticks to his guns and just says what he wants.
  • Boyle is in the public eye, where people are judged harsher than you would be in norml life but he continues his ‘dark’ material the same as he did before his TV fame.

 

How can I do that?

  • Stop caring, you can’t please everyone. Some people will dislike you regardless of how you act, so stop caring and concentrate on being your true self. Say as you think, don’t brown-nose to anyone.
  • Find people that you trust and can be yourself around. Use the confidence gained from this to be yourself with others.
  • Start small if needed. Look for small confrontations you can do and build from there. Instead of letting people off with things, say how you really feel. The confidence you gain from this can be used to challenge in bigger and bigger situations.
  • Humour is an important part of life. Use everyday as a chance to build on your humour and chances to see what you find funny in your life. Try new things and enjoy life. Don’t live someone else’s.

 

So, do I have it right? Did it blow your mind or suck ass? Let me know in the comments below and then watch another!

 

What is it?

Character: The Joker
From: Batman Begins
Type: Action Star
What is this clip about: The Joker has been arrested and is being interrogated by Batman (played by Christian Bale). Throughout the interview, Batman resorts to violence to try and scare the Joker into giving up information, which leads to interesting results.

 

Why should I watch it?

  • The Joker is himself throughout the clip, regardless of whether he is threatened by violence or is actually assaulted by Batman. The Joker does not back down, suck up to Batman or give up on his beliefs solely because Batman is trying to kick the crap out of him.
  • The Joker can read the real reasons behind Batman’s motives and actions. Batman can’t read the Joker and therefore has to resort to violence. The Joker says exactly as he thinks and sticks to his end goal throughout the clip.
  • The Joker is in Police room being interrogated by Batman – who scares all the other Mobsters and Villains, yet the Joker doesn’t care. The Joker remains in control when threatened, he self amuses and cracks jokes and says exactly as he thinks, looking Batman straight in the eye.
  • The Joker remains confident, self-assured and sticks to his skills – e.g. talks his way into people’s heads (Batman gets frustrated and has to resort to violence).

 

How can I do that?

  • Accept that some guys will be dickheads in life (and you will find a lot of them in Pubs and nightclubs). Some guys may go Caveman style at you if they see you coming into their area and trying on a girl they like. Understand that not everyone is as smart as you – assuming your smart as you’re reading this site! – and they may resort to violence. Be prepared for confrontation – just in case. Remember, bullies are scared of you taking their place in the group – try and befriend them if they are in the group with the girl you want (you should befriend and talk to all the group anyway!).
  • Learn to difuse situations away from Pick-up. Confront people (only when needed) in less potentially aggressive places. Stand up for yourself or debate things with people. Try and change their viewpoints and argue your side. Learn to use your negotiation and talking skills to turn people to follow your viewpoint and way of thinking. Bullies/aggressive people can be talked down (I do it regularly).
  • Learn to look past what is happening and consider why things are happening. Look at people’s actions. Are they afraid, are they out of control, are they a bully, have they never been challenged before and so on – each action we do in life has a motive behind it. Most guys will threaten but will never actually resort to violence. Learn to read the real reason somebody does something.
  • If someone takes a swing at you, remain calm. Stick to your true self. People that fight get thrown out. Let the chump get launched out and then go and hit on more hotties.
  • Have a end goal in your life. Find something that you want from life and pursue it continuously. People back down when they see you can’t be threatened by them. Having a end goal will help you ignore bell-ends trying to threaten or hit you when you are trying to pickup women.
  • Unlike the Joker, I’d advise you to learn some basic self-defence. I am leaning more towards Krav Maga as it seems to be the perfect blend of skills that you need in a fight where alcohol can totally affect someone’s normal behaviour.
  • Use positive, open body language. Smile and stand up straight. Anticipate the danger. Most guys throw wild haymakers and you can see them coming a mile away. Dress well so you feel confident in yourself and be sociable to all. Bullies won’t go for the person who is liked by the group – to avoid them becoming alienated by the others.

 

So, who do you think won in that scene? Did it blow your mind or suck ass? Let me know in the comments below and then watch another!

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What is it?

Character: James Bond (played by Daniel Craig)
From: James Bond Films!
Type: Film
Year: 2006
What is this clip about: James Bond meets the über sultry Vesper Lynd (Eva Green) for the first time and they sound each other out over dinner. This is my favourite film and this clip blew my mind the first time that I saw it. It is probably the first time in a James Bond movie that Bond is challenged by a ‘Bond Girl’. I am hoping to go into this scene further in future posts.

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Why should I watch it?

  • Bond and Vesper give a master class in the ability to shift who is holding the power in a conversation back and forth by simply what you say.
  • Bond sounds her out to see if she is worth his time. He makes her work to see if she is worth pursuing. He is self-amusing and doesn’t supplicate to her.
  • Bond tools her repeatedly and draws her in, she responds to him throughout. Bond is brilliant in how he engages women throughout the film.
  • Bond stays on the right side of confidence vs arrogance. He thanks her for mentioning his ass (which could lead to an arrogant reply), but he also uses self-depreciating language to avoid coming across as arrogant (sympathising with the skewered lamb).
  • Bond talks masculine in a deep and slow manner, maintains strong eye contact and dresses smartly. These all allow him to feel good within himself and project the confidence outward. He is also in great shape and this makes him feel confident and secure in himself.This clip is a great example of how you can draw confidence from your daily life.

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How can I do that?

  • Stop putting women on pedestals – stop making them ‘special’. A lot of dating guys will not put any serious work or be too bothered towards a woman in any way until he has slept with them.
  • Self-amuse around women. Go out simply to have fun – women are a secondary consideration. Build a life of great fun and excitment and women will be naturally attracted to you.
  • Look to hang around with people who challenge you and encourage you to learn new skills and better yourself. As the old saying goes: “if you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room!”
  • Have hobbies and interests that you enjoy and can talk about. Be interested in the world around you and during interactions with people.
  • Dress confidently and maintain the virtues of deep masculine tone, strong eye contact, get into shape etc.
  • Appreciate and enjoy the little things in life e.g. a great conversation.

So, who do you think won in that scene? Did it blow your mind or suck ass? Let me know in the comments below and then watch another!

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What is it?

Character: Lord Flashheart
From: Blackadder
Type: Comedy Stars
What is this clip about: Blackadder and George have decided to join the ’20 Minuters’ flying squad and are going to their first training lession … being led by Lord Flashheart!

Why should I watch it?

  • Lord Flashheart just doesn’t care. He struts in and says and he says and does as he wants. Notice how he swaggers in, with complete confidence (the character is meant to be sex-mad so he leads by the groin).
  • He completely controls the group of men, who all hang on his words (obviously except for Blackadder who hates him!). He assumes that they all love him and want to follow him. He tools people who are not completely down with his beliefs. He trusts in himself that the guys will follow him.
  • He builds emotional state in the group by making crude jokes, talking loudly and excitedly and gets them to join in by repeating catch-phrases  (a lot of dating guys will get you to do this sort of thing at the start of a night to build your state and loose your inhibitions). He becomes the ‘cool’ guy of the group and people gravitate towards the cool person in the group.
  • He has complete control. He takes up the room, he is loud, projecting his voice far, locks eye contact with anyone who speaks to him and just tells them, not asks, tells them what to do. It’s an over-dramatic display but you get the gist of it!

 

How can I do that?

  • Stop trying to befriend everyone. Stop caring and trying to please everyone – it’s not possible. Set your beliefs and stick to them. You can’t appease everyone but you will be happier inside by being true to your core values as a person.
  • People like to be led. Try talking a bit louder than other males. Lock in eye contact with people you speak to. Build an emotional state in them. Do this by talking excitedly about what you enjoy, bring others into the conversation, look to give value to others rather than leech value from others.
  • Some people will try and challenge you for leadership. Learn to deal with confrontation. Talk loudly when needed. Speak your mind and don’t try to suck up but ensure you speak as you believe. Some people are general dicks and you should just ignore them as it isn’t worth your time.
  • Leadership is about understanding what you followers need and supplying it to them but also about telling them how to do it. Practise giving people small orders and expand from there. People follow people who are good at helping them. Build your reputation as the go to guy for help by continually learning and developing yourself.
  • Try volunteering with coaching kids or something similar. Maybe look at doing some supervisor work in your job. Start small but learn to lead from the front. Any experience in leading others (no matter their age) is a major step in the right direction.

 

How was it? Did it blow your mind or suck ass? Let me know in the comments below and then watch another!

 

What is it?

Character: Muhammad Ali
From: Boxing
Type: Sport Stars
What is this clip about: Michael Parkinson is retiring and is showing clips of his favourite guests he has interviewed, Ali being one. In this video, there are different clips of their interviews and how Ali treads the line majestically between confidence and arrogance. Ali is perhaps the greatest boxer of all time yet, he never comes across as arrogant.

Why should I watch it?

  • Ali is considered the greatest boxer of all time. He made mountains of money and had every person around him telling him he was the greatest, yet Ali is self-aware throughout the interview, uses wit and irony and humour to just be himself. If he had been arrogant, he would have been more stand offish, he wouldn’t have been as open towards the ‘deeper’ questions (e.g. about getting hurt).
  • Ali had a big goal in his life and he worked hard towards achieving it. As he did so, Ali accumulated reference points from others, of how good he was (the numerous knockouts etc). Yet, he never becomes arrogant. He enjoys making others laugh, bringing the crowd into the fun and making the experience unforgettable for all. He appreciates his fans and loves to interact with them.
  • Watch Ali’s body language, it is a supreme display of self-confidence. He leans back and has open and inviting body language. When he talks, he locks on eye contact and talks slowly, clearly and in a deep masculine voice. Parkinson can’t help but be drawn into him, notice how Parkinson leans forward, like he is being sucked into the experience Ali is creating.
  • Ali dresses to impress. Ali took pride in his appearance and it gave him confidence to know he looked good. If he were arrogant, I would have expected him to bring a Championship belt to the interview.
  • Ali was aware that he has his faults. He knew that to be the best, he had to learn new skills and become the best at them. He analysed his opponents and got in their heads. He was humble enough to know they had weaknesses and he sought them out. Ali wasn’t stupid enough to assume he would always win regardless.
  • You won’t find anyone to say Ali is arrogant. Yet, everyone (of a certain age-range anyway) typically uses him when asked for a confident male.

 

How can I do that?

  • Like Ali, you need to get a goal in your life. Pick something that is far away from your current reality, and something that you will need to work hard to achieve it. You can’t get arrogant if you know you always need to improve. Life should always be about improvement and bettering yourself.
  • Be self-aware, you will know inside if you have become the sort of person that people will avoid. Watch other people’s reactions. Ask for feedback from them. It becomes apparent quickly when people are not impressed with how you are behaving (and most will tell you soon enough if you are being a arrogant dick!).
  • It is OK to be great at something but always remember that you can always learn something about it, you are never perfect. Be proud of your achievements but it should never be all there is about you.
  • Spend time with others, look to help them if possible. Ali is aware that others aren’t him, that others aren’t as good as him. He brings others into his experience, to make them have a great time. Do the same.
  • Become confident by working towards your goals. Use the successes as reference points to build your confidence. Use the failures as learning experiences. Always consider yourself a pupil learning and never the teacher and you should stay on the right side of confidence and never become arrogant.

 

How was it? Did it blow your mind or suck ass? Let me know in the comments below and then watch another!

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What is it?

Character: Jack Bauer
From: 24
Type: TV Star
What is this clip about: In this clip, we have numerous examples of Jack Bauer’s great tonality.

Why should I watch it?

  • Bauer’s has a deep masculine tone. When he talks his standard voice tone is louder than normal. He doesn’t just talk, it’s like he is talking right through the person (or whispers sinisterly), Bauer doesn’t hold back. This can be used to control women, tool chodes and the like.
  • Bauer gets right into the person’s proximity, he invades their personal space. He looks them in the eye and talks straight at (not to, AT them). He talks to them as if he is reprimanding a small child. People listen to him and act Beta towards him.
  • Bauer doesn’t fuck around. He asks direct and simple questions. There is no fluff in Bauer’s questions, he simply asks people exactly what he needs to, to get the information that he needs.
  • Notice that it doesn’t matter who the person is, man or woman, Bauer does the same to all.

How can I do that?

  • Don’t be scared to raise your voice, it’s not against the law. Talk louder (but stay clear) than normal. Build it up till you reach a level that feels natural and authoritative.
  • Look people in the eye, connect with women (or men) and imagine you are speaking only to them. Talk to them as if it’s only you and them in the world. Maintain that eye contact throughout but remember to blink!
  • Ask exactly what you mean, don’t sugar coat it. Do not hold back and especially do not try to pretend or sneak into someone’s affection – it just doesn’t work. Just man up and say what you mean.
  • Get up close to people. Invade the space around people that social norms means you would normally avoid. Girls see it as confidence, guys seem it as a dominant gesture and tend to back away from Alpha displays (be careful when doing this as it can leads to people drunk or coked up throwing punches). You will need to learn through trial and error what is too much and what is just right.
  • Practice it at every opportunity you can. Every social interaction (even with family) is a chance to work on your assertiveness and vocal tonality.

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How was it? Did it blow your mind or suck ass? Let me know in the comments below and then watch another!

 

What is it?

Character: Tallahassee
From: Zombieland
Type: Film Star
What is this clip about: It’s a montage of Tallahassee’s scenes in the epic Zombieland, one of my most favourite films of all time.

Why should I watch it?

  • He totally doesn’t give a fuck. He cracks jokes at the most inappropriate times and says exactly what he is thinking. He doesn’t supplicate for no one!
  • He does as he wants. He dresses exactly as he wants. He passionately pursues his goal in life (finding a Twinkie), no matter how stupid it may seem to others! Tallahassee has a goal in his life and he goes balls out to get it.
  • He can talk to men. He has bro time and wants to help and improve his mates.
  • Tallahasse has confidence in himself and his skills. He will put himself into dangerous situations to save others. He never panics, he just believes in himself and what he can do, no matter how scary the odds are.
  • He has fun, purely for the … erm … fun of it! Like kids do, Tallahassee just does things for the pure enjoyment of it, not to suck up or make others laugh. He doesn’t bottle things up, he just lets his frustrations out in ‘healthy’ ways (well in a Zombie apocalyptic society anyway!)
  • He doesn’t play up to impress any girls. He dances, he doesn’t care what she thinks, he does his own things (reenacting the Slimer scene from ‘Ghostbusters’ with Bill Murray is typical of him) no matter how geeky it may seem to the hot girl.
  • He’s genuinely grateful for the help from others (her finding him the Twinkie). He appreciates the little things.

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Who: Seeley Booth
From: Bones (TV Show)
What is this clip about: This clip is about Seeley Booth and the protective actions he makes to protect his partner Brennan. Booth is confident, aggressive and assertive to ensure his goals are met.

Booth who? Why should I care?

When most guys hear the term ‘Alpha Male’ and read up on it, they tend to get the wrong idea completely. Partly, due to some shitty advice on other websites, guys come away with the idea that to be a Alpha Male, you need to be the toughest dude in the house. Beginner guys think you need to throw the punches, insult everyone and push people around. Those guys get fucking nowhere fast.

When I thought of assertive people to show you, Booth came straight to mind. He dominates other men. He controls people who are considerably smarter than he is. He is admired and respected by his peers. He stands up for himself. I would like to be more like him too!

So what does he do that I should take note of?

He only uses violence (read: not the usual restraining of suspects) when absolutely necessary to protect his loved one. Booth protects what he holds dear to him. He willingly risks his FBI career a few times to protect Brennan (his work partner/lover). He aims to protect her above all – he even takes a bullet for her (before they are lovers). When she is hurt, he looks after her and reassures her when she is ill or hurt. Booth is Alpha enough to be himself and vulnerable with her (he remains authoritative and dominant with everyone else) When he protects Brennan, he is passionate and scary – this turns other ‘scary’ males to Beta.

Men shouldn’t control their partners but in this clip Booth tries to stop Brennan from being in trouble by controlling what she does. He does it for her own protection but in this case he is wrong.

In one scene, Booth has been shot while trying to rescue Brennan. He doesn’t care about his own physical pains until he has seen that Brennan is safe. Even when thing are against him or he is hurt, he still takes the lead and controls the other officers, to ensure success in the mission (in this case, to rescue Brennan). He never gives up on his goal, no matter how badly things are against him.

Guys he threatens know from his actions and passion, that he is serious, he doesn’t just talk

Listen to him. He uses a strong deep voice and people feel compelled to listen to him. He boosts this with strong deep eye contact and people feel almost scared to look else where.

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